Maced Myself

Yeah, only I could pull this off.

I was walking home from work last night, late. I've had some mace on my key chain for a couple of years but never used it. So, I was bored walking home and decided to make sure the thing worked. I'd hate to have to use the thing and it fizzles out right when I need it.

The snap was pretty tough to open. :) Then, to depress the button, you have to twist the top, then push down. Yeah, that's what you think about when you are facing an attacker. "Hold on a sec, I need to turn this cap so I can push the button. I'll be with you in a minute. Thanks." I can see, though, that it would need protection, esp from people such as myself.

Anyway, when I sprayed it, the stream was pretty weak then fizzled completely. Not only that, but it leaked out all over my fingers from the weak sprayer and nozzle. No more umph. Glad I got that out of my system. Time to get a new one, I guess. I threw the empty can away and wiped snow over my hands to clean the sticky mess and continued home.

Did I mention it was late? More like early. The last case at work went really late and I stayed to finish it up. I walked into our apartment just before 1am this morning. Of course, Daryl and I haven't seen each other all day, so he wants to catch up. I'm nodding and saying "uhha" at the right times to keep the conversation going and listening to his stories of the girls' adventures. 'My nose itches.' Hmmm, why does my nose sting. 'These darn eyelashes. It's been bugging me all day.' Rub, rub, rub... AHAHAHA!! 'My eye's burning!!' Why? 'The mace!' How'd you get mace in your eye!?! 'It got on my hands; I sprayed the can and it leaked on my fingers!' (cannot help the tearing; letting it tear and wash out my eye) 'Oh it burns. Do you think if I wash it out it will go away faster?' Probably. 'I'm too tired. I'll just let the tears clean it.' Can't stand it any longer. I go to the sink and splash water on my face (not knowing that it burns worse if you rub it!) and the burning spreads. So I grab face soap and scrub. Still burning. I gave up, dried my face and went back to bed. "My eye feels better, but the rest of my face is on fire. I don't care. I'm going to sleep."

Moral to the story: Aim carefully...and don't scratch.

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